Tipperary family's tribute to 'much-loved sister who was first and foremost our friend'

The family of Tipperary woman Deirdre Ryan, who passed away at the end of December paid tribute to her at her funeral in St Mary's of the Rosary Church, Nenagh.

Speaking on behalf of the family, her brother Liam said:

"On behalf of Denis, Joe, Damian, Dermot and myself, I would like to thank all of you for coming here to mourn and celebrate the life of our much-loved sister Deirdre.

"The deluge of warm, heartfelt and incredibly moving tributes to Deirdre this last week has been of great comfort to us all. They also stand as an incredible testament to the impact made by Deirdre in the all too short time she spent in this world.

"The glowing tributes also confirmed to her five brothers what we had long known - Deirdre was the best of us.

"She played a unique role in our family. We took turns to tease her throughout her life that she was our “favourite sister” and perhaps the fact she was the only girl was always going to set her apart as special to us -- but it was so much more than that.

"Born in 1968, the fourth of John and Susan’s six children, Deirdre became the glue that bonded our family.

"Deirdre was first and foremost our friend. To her we were “the boys”. We always wanted and craved her involvement in our lives. She was our number one supporter and advocate.

"And if you went offside you were quickly told about it - Deirdre certainly put manners on us when we lost the run of  ourselves.

"But she always had our backs. As we had our own families, Deirdre extended that support and love to our partners, and her nieces and nephew, whom she loved so very, very much.

"As her great friend and Labour Party colleague Johnny Whelan said earlier this week, her brothers are the lucky ones to have had her in their lives.

"Deirdre’s personality and values, also warmly captured in tributes this week, were unquestionably shaped by our parents, John and Susan, who she so worshipped.

"From John, the consummate publican, she learned the importance of being a good listener. It became the cornerstone of her many cherished friendships; it was why she became such a trusted confidante to so many people.

"From Susan, she also learned empathy. Like her mother before her, Deirdre’s ability to put herself into someone else’s shoes and see their perspective was a quality that served her so well.

"Deirdre loved Mam and Dad deeply. Friendship and mutual respect were at the heart of their relationship. She returned to the family home in Hawthorns and lived with them in their final years, becoming in many respects their primary carer. Their deaths in 2016 and 2018, blows to us all, had a particularly profound effect on Deirdre who was bereft.

"Deirdre brought her values to her working life.

"Having finished secondary school in 1987, Deirdre spent time in college in Dublin and a period in London before spending most of the 1990s with the international aid agency Concern, based in Dublin. She did a six-month stint in Nairobi as part of the organisation’s logistics team.

"It was a very happy time in her life; she loved the work and as in every period of her life she made lasting friendships.

"Her long association with the Labour Party began in the late 1990s. Fairness and equality were high on her list of priorities and she believed Labour could deliver them. There may have also been some encouragement from a certain younger brother.

"Having left Concern and back in Nenagh, she returned to further education in UL. She took on different jobs and worked with the Red Cross for a time.

"As a Labour Party volunteer, she threw herself into constituency work and campaigns. By 2008 her value to the party was recognised when she was employed on a full-time basis in the Nenagh constituency office.

"She loved the cut and thrust of politics. Election campaigns of all hues were exciting and energising. Deirdre particularly enjoyed the roles she played supporting first-time women candidates. The thrill when they got elected was even better.

"As well as her organisational and admin skills, her knowledge of her community made her an invaluable canvassing weapon. I don’t think I’m overstating it when I say that Deirdre was responsible for capturing votes for Labour from people who wouldn’t have been natural-born supporters of the party. And I’m not only talking about her Fine Gael-leaning father here.

"As in many areas of her life, her main impact was often made behind the scenes. Deirdre toiled in the background and avoided the spotlight. Listening to constituents, helping them with their issues, was fulfilment enough. She was fiercely loyal to the party in good times and bad, a vital cog in the constituency party machine.

"And again she forged deep friendships: with party members and party officials, in Tipperary and beyond.

"Deirdre also had a strong loyalty to the place where she was from. She was fiercely proud of Summerhill where she grew up; of Nenagh (god help anyone who did down the town in her presence); of north Tipp; and of Tipperary as a whole.

"She had enormous community involvement outside of her political life - she fundraised for a huge number of charities and pursued her interests in theatre and literature with local groups.

"Deirdre’s work and commitment to community will be recognised when representatives of six organisations she was active with - the Labour Party, Concern, the Nenagh Players, the Dromineer Literature Festival, the Suaimhneas cancer support group, and the A-TEAM autism support group - provide a joint guard of honour as we leave the church.

"Down through all these years and through her rich and varied life, chronic health issues cast a shadow over Deirdre and led to frequent hospital stays and medical interventions. Most significantly, both her adrenal glands were removed. She was diagnosed with Addison’s Disease. As a result, for more than 20 years she had to take daily doses of steroids.

"Deirdre always wore her health difficulties lightly - she often spent more time asking how you were rather than talking about her troubles - but it all took its toll. She endured some dark days.

"These last 15 years were also punctuated by dramatic Addison’s crises which led to more than one cardiac arrest. Her ability to bounce back after such events never failed to amaze her family and close friends.

"Having suffered another Addison’s crisis on the back of contracting a flu virus, she was hospitalised on Christmas night.

"By Friday evening, Deirdre had been discharged and was home. It seemed she had again done her Lazarus act. But it was not to be. She died later that night.

"The thing about Deirdre - in case you think her life was too earnest or too difficult - is that she was such great fun and a pure joy to know and be around. She packed so much into her 54 years.

"She was warm and witty. Her humour was razor sharp - an arch comment here, a withering look there. That broad smile, that laugh – they won over all comers.

"She was a great storyteller in the tradition of her mother Susan.

"People loved and sought out her company. Just look at her enormous cast of friends.

"She loved fine food, was fond of a cocktail – Bloody Marys and brunch with cousin Suzanne allowed her to occasionally do both early on the same day.

"She loved music and live gigs - she saw Leonard Cohen in Dublin, Sligo, Edinburgh and Barcelona.

"Most of all, though, Deirdre cherished the company of her friends.

"Many of you are here today – friends from her school days in Nenagh and Templemore, from Concern, from the Labour Party, from all areas of her very busy life.

"We, her family, are so grateful for the part you played in her life.

T"he family would particularly like to highlight the friendship of Virginia O'Dowd who was there for Deirdre at every turn, caring and supportive in difficult times, sharing and fun-loving in the good times. The sister she didn't have.

"Deirdre left her mark on this world in so many ways and on so many people.

"So Johnny, it wasn’t just the brothers - all who knew Deirdre Ryan were lucky to have known her.

"We will miss her so much but will cherish her memory. We know you will too."